Sear's "Black Friday Deals"

Now they're not even being very clever about it...

Man says to salesmen... "We have a bet. You're having Black Friday Deals every Friday right."

Salesman... "Nope. Every Saturday."

Cut to wife taking stupid man's money.

Stupid man thinking that Black Friday deals would be on Fridays. He's lucky he even has a wife. At least they let him have hair.

They should have just had the wife walk in and say, "I bet you my husband is dumb." Then she walks away with the money.

Fresh Express Salad

We'll start with a new commercial I saw today for bagged salad. It shows a variety of people holding a bag of "Fresh Express" salad, which is so fresh that there appears to be a festive party raging right inside the bag. How fun! Who are these people... Young woman, older woman, black older woman, young boy.

Cut to person holding sad depressing competitor bagged salad. Who's got the droopy greens? Middle aged balding white guy!

Dude. Sucks to be him.
(I know this because I am him!)